Yo peeps, how time has passed.In about 5 hours time I will be leavin for the Airport, away for a month.It has been a long time since I left home for such a long period of time.
I had all my stuff packed, nothing much to bring actually.Havin a flu right now again, didnt have enough sleep thatz why the flu came.Itz pretty usual..Haha...So today didnt do anythin much, just went for meals, wash my car and sleepin at home.Was damn tired cant even really drive.How was everyone weekend??
This couple of days when i was out i came across many couples.Something cross my mind, what is a relationship??Do everyone need a relationship??People need or wants a relationship, and it comes with different meanin.Some wants a bf/gf just to show off to others they have one, some just to have one so that at least someone is there to keep him/her company, some have one to take advantage of.Some have one purely because they love each other and needs someone to care for.So what are yours??How much do we understand about our partner??Have you ever come across a time when you sit down and realize you dont even understand your partner??When this time ever come itz too late.Why people rush into a relationship without fully understandin the person??yes, i agree with relationship and love grows as time past.But how long do you have??Do you wanna regret at the day we guys are exchangin vows and realize hey i dont really understand him/her.Itz always happy in the beginnin of every relationship but as time goes by you dont get what you normally get durin the first few months.All the sweet talks, endless chat, jokes and gifts.It will come to a day when you guyz have nothin to talk about, no surprises, no jokes, forgetin anniversary, forgetin birthday and stuff.Itz pretty normal I guess...
Married couples is even worse then i suppose.Talk when necessary??More arguments will arise, the understandin in each other will slowly fade.And when you realize they are not talkin to each other at all only when theres a problem.
So i guess, gettin into an relationship is easy, maintainin one is difficult.Slowly day by day we will understand our partner lesser.It will take alot of effort to do all over again.
Guyz, im leavin for taiwan already.Dont miss me..will be back on the 16 Apr.Meanwhile, play hard and work hard too.Take good care of your health. =)
Yo peeps, finally im able to get the page loaded up.Something was pretty wrong with my connection this few days.Yes, the countin down begins.In a very short time i will be at the airport waitin to leave for Taiwan.
Ehmm...I did something crazy this week.Guess what??I shave my head.Now my hair is damn short, like those prisoners.When I go out everyone is givin me the million dollar look."what happened to him??", "Just came out from jail ar??" This is what I can imagine when I look into their eyes.Haha...Nvm, who cares.I got my April salary already, meanin next month no salary but nvm got bonus.Haha...Have to put aside some money for my loans.
Anyway, didnt do anythin much today.Reached home 0600hrs in the mornin.The live firin ended like around 2330 and reached camp late already so didnt book out.The range wasnt so good, muddy ground and wet.It like so bored havin to work when everyone is on off.Oh ya, I wanna buy a notebook when I return from Taiwan and do up a router for my internet connection.So at least its easier for my brother and me, we are like sharin the computer now.
I saw a video click on "You Tube" this mornin.Pretty interestin and funny.I will tried to add it in into this post.Anyway, today post is quite borin because nothin much to blog about.
Yo peeps..the countdown timer has started again.Just like 3 months ago when the timer starts for Brunei.6 more days and i will be leavin for Taiwan.Everyone is busy packin their kit bag, buyin things and changin money.I have done nothin about it yet.
Today, 16km route march was a killer.The trooper didnt even walk because CO was pissed off with them, so guess what??only the commanders walk, every rest point is like only 5 minutes and the pace was fast and slow.Thus, i was injure again.An old injury actually which I incurred durin my first year in service.Havin to walked 32km in uneven terrain and stoney areas causin both my knee cap to injure.I have not seen the doctor since then.I have problem with my knee cap when I start walkin fast or long distance.If i were to see the doctor im very sure i will get downgrade and in the end out of service.I cant be in service side but only combat.Because I sign on as a combat specialists, so no matter what i have to endure with the pain.At the 12km mark the pain was really killin me, now im walkin limpin again.Sigh..Just before flyin im injure and guess what once i touchdown i will have to prepare for a 3 days 2 nights navigation exercise which require me to carry load, climb the hills and walk again.How to recover like that??
Then again, no off before flyin off.Thursday everyone is goin on off and im attached to cover safety for live firin..WTH...Most of the my friends are flyin off either tonight or Friday night.Im takin the last flight there which is on the 19 mar at 0700hrs and takin the last second flight back which is on 16 Apr at 2130.By then most of my friends are back home and im still stuck there.Just because i have to look after my troopers.Borin...Pretty pissed off with them today, just givin them attitude.Itz been a long time since i was so pissed off over the platoon.Well, anyway itz over.
Nothin much to expect from the trip just hope that my platoon dont have to walk too much.Just imagine my missile weighs around 23kg.23kg at the back of your body, the missile is long about half my height.This 23kg doesnt include my combat load.Signal set, ammo, weapon, map Bino, compass.The weight can easily add up to 30kg.Thatz the weight I have to carry, my platoon has the heaviest load throughout the whole battalion.No one else can fight with us.
Ehmm....im sufferin from depression.Serious depression...
Yo peeps, howz the weekend goin??Im pretty bored thou.Was like indoor the whole day and came to do some soul searchin too.
I feel that my life is pretty screwed up one way or another.Sometimes, walkin on the streets I see students, adults carryin their briefcase goin to work in their nice workin suit.Goin home after knockin off, havin lunch of their choice.And I looked at myself...havin the same food every week, same dish everyday of the week for breakfast,lunch and dinner.Havin to wear the god damn uniform 24/7, havin to paint my face green and black when trainin comes, carryin heavy load and gettin injury.Havin to take physical test every now and then, run, route marches, paper work and area cleanin.I just find it damn sucky, screwed up.
6 years in Primary school, what have I done??Wasted too much time on my ECA, volunteerin myself too much.How many times have i skip class just to do volunteer work.5 years in secondary school, what have I achieved??Nothin..Yes..I have made some wonderful friends, some horrible friends.Some happy moments and some sad moments.I have put too much times spendin with my friends, soccer and stuff.Who do i blame??I can only blame myselg and nagged at myself.How envy i was to see people being able to study, able to go one step higher.Up to today, im still questionin myself 'Why the fuck did I sign on' ??Im fuckin regrettin the decision because of one person.I hate the regimental life, i hate being control and now im in a fuckin job that im being tied down all the time.I fucked up my education, i fucked up my job and I fucked up my life.
I can possibly be happy.It hasnt really been good since I posted to 4 SIR.Yes, I made some wonderful people but sometimes i just hate it.I hate it when my parents have to start worryin for me whenever I book out.They know me, even if im facin a problem I wont tell them. They know when im feelin down, they know when im havin problems. But all they can do is to just see me this way.How many times have i came home with injury??My legs, hands, knee caps and my back. My friends laugh at me, sayin im a dumb idiot to sign on.Only idiots sign on.But whats the reason??Only 1 person knows, yes...Im foolish to sign on, my mum didnt even know that i sign on till Im enlisted. She dont even know what my contract says, I got my dad to sign the consent for me.He talked to me for hours not to sign but at the end i signed.The tears my family shed for me when I was taken away to camp.I know i wont be able to take the tough trainin, i know myself.how many times hae my asthma attack durin the first few months of trainin.Nobody knows.How many times I fall sick??But what can i do??My fuckin signature is on that damn paper.
I hate my life whenever things happened.I wanna run away from problems, I dont wanna be in the force.I dont care if you people think itz good anot.If itz good why dont you sign on and try??Many people regretted signin on.Be i for money,interest or even runnin away from problems.Many people regretted.Yes, the pay is good.I like the pay but i hate the life in there. I felt sad whenever i cant meet the requirement, im afraid i cant handle my troopers and pressure.I really hate it, this is not the kinda life im lookin for.
I realise now that no point sacraficin for someone.Because at the end of the day you wont get back anythin in return.Human are selfish, they only think about themselves.Nobody will appreciate what you do, there are reasons behind everythin.And if you cant accept it I freakin cant do anythin.Im not gonna be nice anymore, not gonna let anyone take advantage of me.I made too much mistake in my life, too much wrong decision and i wanna put a full stop to it.Im not gonna feel guilty over anythin.I have done what im suppose to do.
To that someone out there.You are the reason why I sign on and you know why.Yes, i have told you that I didnt regretted at all but the truth is i have.The every first day i step into camp and worn that uniform and being label as a regular.I have regretted.I almost broke down on the first day in camp goin thur all the shit and tekan session.Now that you have achieved what you wanted its time for me to leave.I have done my part to make you pull thur.Well, its good to see that you are happy and havin a great time with your friends.Well, it will be better this way.I dont need your pity or whatsoever.I have understand and seen enough.People come and go, and guess we will go our seperate ways.There wont be a helicopter waitin for you, pickin you up.I guess we will be friends till today.Was it a best decision??I dont know..Anyway, Good luck in whatever you do.
1 more week and im leavin for Taiwan, will only touchdown back in Singapore on 16 April.1 month trip might be long and i hope it would be my last overseas trainin.Itz gonna be shag for sure.But i cant do anythin, I just have to suffer in silence.Anyway, no one understand it either.What the point of explainin??
Guyz, have a great weekend.No off for me before flyin off and it makes it even sucky.Work till Friday then Monday fly off.I hate it...I have yet to packed my stuff because i have given up and im not that interested.
Yo peeps, this is the 123th post so far.Is it abit too much??heehee...okay, so ya today is Thursday and im back home already.why??Because there is Division Life Run tomorrow morning at East Coast Park.What time??0700hrs, thatz early for a non-workin Friday man.
Anyway, both good news and bad news this week or rather this 2 days.This mornin I finally passed my SOC test with a timin of 09.19 mintues.I almost fainted at the end point, haha..Never mind about that but the most important thing is I got my freakin 8 days off plus my performances bonus in April.Yeah...Im gonna be damn rich in April.Why??Because I will be away trainin ad wont be spendin so much money on my car.Haha...So whats the sad news??The battalion had send my name up for promotion in May..WTH...what does it mean??If im promoted in May, i cant leave the force in December.WTH...Yes, the pay is gonna increased big time but WTH..Yeah, i must agree itz a good job with good pay.Which dipolma or degree holder earns my pay??NONE...Zero...I have checked it out, they actually earned much lesser than me.So i got it, whats the point of studyin so much??Waste money, wasted time and theres no way you gonna earned good money.Guess what??The government is gonna review Civil Servant pay again, meanin im gonna earn more.Haha...Im gonna make SAF my part time job.haha
Ehmm..other than this 2 matters nothin much happened this week.Today I went Dentention Barrack to fetch my trooper out.10 days just fly so fast, actually he didnt served 10 days, he only served 8 days...haha..well, just hope he turn over a new leaf.
Ehmm...Guyz, i have nothin much to blog.I dont wanna blog too much as i cant reveal some of my feelings out...it will cause more trouble...
Yo peeps, here I am again bloggin..What a week, pretty fast huh.Cold and wet week to live with.3 workin days for me because im on MC on monday and tuesday.What did i miss out??Nothing actually, just that i have some admin stuff to finish but well i had it done like in 15 minutes.
So how it went.My hand was pretty fine now, but guess what??I incurred more injury for the past 3 days.On Friday i fell off the swingin bridge durin SOC test and it hit and rib cage.It was slippery when i ran passed it, i slip fall on the bridge an as the bridge swing back it hit my rib cage.Not much of a problem but i just felt the pain, so i fall out and didnt continue with the test.Today, we had test again.This time round i injure my legs, yes, i shouldnt blame on anythin that cause my failure but sigh...it was damn sad..I was almost there but....well, no point talkin about it anymore.
Yes, 2 more weeks and im flyin off again to Taiwan for trainin.3 months ago i just return from Brunei and with just one blink im flyin again to Taiwan.This time to go with a mission, lots of mission to be completed unlike Brunei where i only cover lifeguard duty.This time round i will sleepin out in the field, carryin the load, climbin the hills,sweat it out, camo on and worst of all combat ration.Trust me till now I have yet to adapt to combat ration.The ration just sucks, every meal smell the same,taste the same.Just cant handle it.1 month of trainin there which will be long.Im just not lookin forward to it, but well i cant wait for the divin trip to Dayang when i return from Taiwan.Yeah...
On Tuesday, one of my trooper was sent to Dentention Barrack for the offence of 'Theft'.He just given a 10 days stay in there.Well, he is a average soldier.He isnt physically fit but his outfield discipline is there.What I can say that he is doin things without thinkin.Hope in turn over a new leaf when he is released.Finally, i got my team to work together.My 2IC is finally takin control of the team, the encouragement that he is showin.Everyone in the team is doin better than before.Thatz what i wanna see.Being there for one another and fightin till the end.
Now back to myself.9 more months and i can officially leave the force.Do i really wanna leave??Yes...Although now i have so much support from my fellow commanders but i know myself.i dont think im fit for the job.Im not physically fit for the job, i can be mentally fit, i can plan,control and exacute but thats not enough.I donno...I dont wanna fight ATEC but my team is startin to get on track i dont wanna leave them dyin with a new commander.But at the same time, i just cant take all the pressure and unfairness in the organisation.what should i do??Come to think of it i dont have much time to think anymore.Time just flies so fast.Headache....
Guyz, what should i do??should i be irresponsible and just leave??or should i just fight till the end till the mono ends??Sigh
